One class that should be mandatory at all state colleges (except perhaps for the University of Utah) is bar etiquette. Unfortunately, the colleges haven’t figured out what a lucrative and popular class this would be as everyone would thoroughly enjoy their homework. As there is not such a class, might I just offer a quick lesson.
You have been cut off
DO NOT proceed to flip the bartender off, grab your ball sack, and say something nasty about the doorman’s mother.
DO apologize for your drunkenness and ask for a cab home.
Your credit card declines
DO NOT proceed to start a tirade about how the restaurants computer systems don’t work and that you know that Bank of America is conspiring against you.
DO discreetly find another form of payment.
You have lost your cell phone
DO NOT proceed to tell everyone that the owner of the restaurant has a black market in used cell phones and that you KNEW this was going to happen
DO ask if you can fill out a lost and found form and put a number on it that isn’t your cell phone number
These are just some quick lessons in making your bar experience all the more enjoyable – and isn’t that what it’s all about.
Fresh Etiquette
1 ounce pureed cucumber
2 ounces of fresh squeezed lime
2 ounces of simple syrup
2 ounces of Square One Cucumber Vodka
Shake until chilled and strain. Serve with a cucumber garnish.
- Columbine QuillenI am a mixologist bartender and this is my blog.